Haay.. I'm so exhausted today, but I was able to de-stress by playing gunbound and commenting on blogs, but no one seems to update their blogs..

I'm exhausted today, not just physically but mentally. I am not reviewing for the division achievement test, but something bad happend a while ago.

I was riding the jeepney as usual, and the jeepney was running super fast! Maybe about 100 kph, He was the kaskasero type and he would always overtake. I wanted to tell him, "Manong, wag pong masyadong mabilis." But I was too shy, so I didn't. Every person in the jeepey was alert and were all looking at the driver. The ride was so fast and it was mentally tiring. I prayed: "Lord, sana po wag ma-aksidente 'tong jeep na sinasakyan ko, ayoko pong mamatay nang ganito." Then the most tiring part was that, I was afraid that he would not stop when I go down the vehicle, like what usually happens when drivers go too fast, so I said: "Mama, sa tabi lang po", I waited until the vehicle was on a full stop, I walked fast, then before I get down, the thing I was fearing happend, the jeepney accelerated so fast! I almost fell down the jeep. And 2 people, I don't know who were they tried to grab my arms so I won't fall down. I already experienced that 2 times before but this is the worst. You know what I did, I didn't curse him or anything, I might look like a moron if I did. I recited his plate number aloud "TWV-847". I hope he has a sharp ear and he heard it too keep him worried. I want him to get scared. All of his passengers were looking at me. I am a forgetful person so I kept on saying it to my mind while walking a t the side walk, until I took my phone on my bag and saved his plate number, until now, I can't forget it. I want to report him to LTO, and I wish that LTO had a text thingy wherein you text them "LTO <name> <complaint>" then send it to ****. Unfortunately, they don't have that. Good thing, prayers definitely work, the jeepney didn't crash onto something or anything, but I almost fell downright it. I don't want to roll down the highway... I have a fear of having wounds and scars on my legs and arms.

I'm really feeling tired right now. I need to make my Filipino theme... waah! I spent my time bumming around the internet and playing GunBound... Gosh.

Holy week... pretty early.

I was about to confess last Monday... and after being there at the church for almost 2 hours, my mom told us to go home. Great. I had my exams the next day.

I also went to the Way of the Cross yesterday. I had so many bad things there... But I also saw someONE. hahaha! I kinda misplaced my feet for 4 times, while wearing FLATS... like the way your feet gets when you wear stilettos and you lose balance with it... haha! I was also a victim of the hot candle wax like for 11 times... 3 with my hands and the rest on my feet. I also managed to slip on that moss. Then... SPLASH! Mud splattered on my left leg... good thing, I did not topple down. I was wearing capris... But. The lucky thing was that the seventh station, the next station when I slipped was designated at our very house. I managed to use our CR and wash my legs... also my face... haha! lucky girl! I also managed to walk on there, from 5:00pm to 9:00 pm without food intake and only a glass of water.

Of course, my feet was aching very much, but not as much as before... though the path was veeeeery long and it was night... i didn't eat dinner well because I was too tired. I was too lazy to chew... I just ate the bread with some filling like pineapple and redundant pinapple juice. I slept at 10:00pm and woke up today at 9:00am.

When I was a child, I was curious why my family doesn't go to the province or to any outing. Then, I realized that going on a vacation(the pampasarap and for-fun type) d uring Holy Week was wrong for a Catholic. Since I was a child, no one in the house could watch TV, turn the radio on, play anything. Even loud voices weren't allowed. Everyone in the house should stay quiet. Abd when I was 10 years old, my mom insisted me to join the Church activities on Holy Week. Now that I'm older, I join it by my will and it feels very fulfilling. I swear. Though it's difficult to resist the urge of having fun.

honestly, the very reason why i was hesitant to go to the prom was because my classmates were all there.

i'm not a phony, and i admit that i am not enjoying the class. but though the case, i am still happy with my life. right now, i am actually hesitating to go to any gig, like the PCA or the outing issues, provoke me to and i would...

i know i have many shortcomings. and all of the tosh people can notice it, because I show them the REAL me, my real strengths and weaknesses. There are much tosh people out there with equal/more shortcomings than me, but of course, we just don't see it because thay are do not show the REAL them. Why is it that everyone has to hate me for my shortcomings, when you also have them? remember the GOLDEN RULE.

okey sige, minsan sa buhay ko, naki-ride-on ako kahit di ko gusto, pro tinago ko un... ang bigat sa loob... inaamin ko naman un eh. pro syempre, dapat tayong matuto sa pagkakamali natin. aaaaand! THOU SHALT NOT LIE.

nasobrahan kaya ako sa pagpapakatotoo?

But this i tell you. I have noticed that the last time they did the last armallite thing during the prom. but why aren't they doing the armallite thing now anymore? may i ask why? And again, this I tell you. Hindi nagbago ung pakikitungo ko sa kanila kahit ginaganon nila ako. I know that they are doing it because they dislike my shortcomings, but is it right to talk about a person on her people's back? hindi ako marunong manggago nang pailalim dahil ayoko ring ginaganon ako. i am not angry with anyone right now. maybe you are angry with me, maybe you have the right to, but i don't care... hindi ako mamamatay kahit anong galit mo saken.

Syempre nung una, di ko alam kung bakit sila pumasok ng room nang nagwawala, tpos kapag tinatanong ko sila isa-isa kung saan galing un, sasabihin nila, "Di ko alam sa kanila". Mga taong tanga lang ang maniniwala dun. alangan namang pumasok lang sa utak nila.

Ul()l, hindi ako nagmamalinis. !#$@&*!

Even if everyone in the class hates me, nothing will happen to my life, unless they will try to grab my neck, or grab a deadly weapon, which, i am sure that they couldn't do.

tama bang nang-gagago ka ng kaklase mo dhl sa masama niyang ugali? pano kaya kung ganunin din kita? sigurado ako marami ka ring masasamang ugali, ayaw mo lang ipakita. magugustuhan mo kaya?

Di totoo na plastik ako dhl dito ko sa blog ko yan sinasabi... dapat alam na nila yan sa sarili nila... baket? hindi pa ba nila alam ung GOLDEN RULE?

I AM A HAPPY PERSON BECAUSE I SHOW THE WORLD WHO I AM, WITHOUT FEARING THE REJECTION    I RECEIVE.

sabi nga ni jobel, you cannot experience truth without happiness and happiness without truth.

please don't think that i'm too boastful about myself... please...

But sometimes, it really hurts me when people don't value my thoughtfulness and sweetness... matagal ko rin pinag-ipunan ang mga binibigay ko... instead of buying myself a new top or accessories, I'm use them to make you happy on your birthdays, but I really feel down and weary when some people just don't value them. But at least some people still value them!! wahahaha!

Of course, Saturday was a day at the National Museum. I was feeling extra-high all day. I was wearing a different pair of earrings, the same style, but different colors. On my right was blue, on my left was green. Too bad for Lyndon, he didn't see it kaya hindi niya ko naasar nung araw na yun. Sayang, balak ko pa namang barahin siya pag inasar niya ko. Joke lang! Kahit ganon ung si Lyndon, classmate ko parin un. Bad Girl me!

I went to the crafts store again, I'd probably die if I don't go there at least once a week. Instead of spending my money for food, I'd rather buy wires, beads, nylon cords and trinkets. I was ultra-happy when I made the thingy for my earrings, my collection is growing and right now and it needs a better container, not a container, but merely a display board. I'm inspired by Happy David. Though I know it's impossible for me to have a store like hers, since I'll be pursuing my college in an engineering course. I made my gifts for certain people. You know!

I also had a major headache, probably because I didn't eat lunch until 2:00pm. i had to sleep for two hours, but I couldn't sleep properly, all my trinkets are in my bed and I am too dizzy to clean it up.

Today is Jerome's graduation day. I made it there of course, because there are no classes. He is an outgoing Nursery student. he made it to the second honors though. I am planning to give him a faber-castell color pencils and a coloring book because he loves coloring. He was very suplado with his classmates that he doesn't want to mingle with them. Although when he is with his cousins, titas and titos, he is very HYPER. Like, he would pretend to be a dinosaur, a lion, a tiger, a chimpanzee or any animal. But he is very active in reciting in his class. He is such a diligent student. He is also very intelligent that he knows many dinosaurs. Allosaurus, Pachycephalosaurus, Spinacosaurus, etc. I think he knows 30-40 dinos. I don't even recognize those things! What's good about it is that he doesn't memorize them, he knows them by heart. He has so many dinosaur toys and he knows what are the names of each of his toys. He also knows many animals. the difference of the tortoise from the turtle. I hope he would continue that until he gets old. I also wish that he would make it to Manila/Philippine Science High School. When we were still neighbors, I would go to their house in the morning and help my cousin give him a bath. I remember those days when he was still young and when I managed to make him fall off the sofa during his first birthday! Yikes! I was even banned to carry him! So much for reminisces. I am graduating next year. I am excited to go to college.

when i'm weary and down... i just take a look at jobel's and karen's letters to me and it lifts up my spirit. It gives me confidence, which I badly lack. i just wanna let them know if ever theyr'e reading this that their letters are on my filecase all the time. Anyway...

Lately, I've been seeing teens and kids dance the Harlem Shake along McArthur Highway, exactly the place where I go down the jeepney. Last time, the place was just a store of speakers and everything related to sounds, except CDs. They always have speakers outside and play very loud music, probably, they played the Harlem Shake music which attracted the teens and kids around the place. Every night, when I go down the jeepney, they are always dancing and people at the jeepney would always look at them (Filipino nature-pagiging usisero/a). Of course, it's a good attraction, and a benefit for both the kids and the store. The store gets free advertisments and the young people get free tambayan and music. Mutualism.

That's a great thing to get rid of drugs... but the BIG question in my mind is: "have they made their assignments or studied their lessons?" Well... I dunno. Anyway again...

I also realized the diversity of life in our new place. I've been living here for exactly 60 days and I've seen a good picture of it. Though I'm still in the same city. About 5 houses away to the right is a millionaire, who owns buses. About 7 houses away to the left is a family who squats in the place. They don't own the land (squatters, of course!). About 2 houses forward is a video game place (2 arcade systems, or whatever you call it, like those in Gbox), where kids play (if and only if they have money). Almost in front of the video game place is the place where gays flock. The house is rented by a gay who owns a beauty parlor. Also, loittering around are thought-to-be-drug-addict s. Hmm... so our place is a dangerous place, don't you think so? There is also a videoke place, wherein people sing not only at night, even at the morning. Our place is great though, it's very quiet and you wouldn't he ar children shouting in the afternoon (exactly when people get their siesta), unlike in our old place. And of course, our place is a dead end so there are no noisy vehicles, specifically trikes, to annoy the residents. I like the silence and serenity in our place actually. Of course, I love it when I am left alone and enjoying the privacy of my own room while studying, sleeping, arranging my closet or creating accessories.

i'm at the computershop. right now. i mean right now. i'm with ariston, paulo, onil and paulo! i'm playing gunbound.

scicamp later... i'm excited for the rapelling [did i spell that correctly?]

hmm... 5 minutesd remaining for me... bye2 now... :)